Once long ago, or about five minutes, there lived a guy named Barg. He was 60, had gray long hair which he put in a pony tail, and a big beard. He lived with his 24 year old sister Tina. Tina was a hot blond. (Yay hot blondes!) Anyway, they lived on a small island in the middle of the ocean. But they still had internet so who cares?
Every time Barg got board he would try to find something fun to do. One day Barg decided to be a pirate. But he needed money. So he cut off his tow and sold it on Ebay. (Yay Ebay!!!) After he sold his toe he bought a ship, and Joe the Monkey and piratey things!
"Where ya going," asked Tina.
"On a quest for Gold, and loot, and..."
"Ya, ya, ya, just be back intime for dinner" interrupted Tina. After that Barg and Joe sailed away.
Joe and Barg hoisted the sails and set off. Then they started to play
checkers. After being beaten by Joe several times Barg yelled: "You stupid primate!"
"Uhh uhh ahh ahh!" argued Joe. Then Joe bit Barg's ear off.
After duct tapping his ear back on, Joe and Barg apologized and got back to their game. But not long after, the
boat hit land.
Then they both got off and looked around. "What sort of evil place is this" asked Barg as he looked at all the people enjoying the sunny day. There were surfers and people eating lunch and sand castles.
"Attack" yelled Barg.
Barg and Joe started hitting people with their swords, then the remembered they had plastic swords. They were only annoying people. So they went back home and had biscuits and gravy.
Moral: If you sell your toe, you will have biscuits and gravy for dinner.
This story is a part of The Adventures of Barg Series.
http://www.alternative-internet.com/quezon/barg/
Discuss this and other Barg stories at the Barg Forum:
http://www.alternative-internet.com/forums/viewforum.php?id=11